The other day some friends and I were discussing upcoming holidays and one brought up Valentine’s Day. First, anything that doesn’t allow for a day off of work I hesitate to classify as a “holiday” but for the sake of the romantically inclined, I’ll let that slide. Second, at the mention of the upcoming V-day I let out this involuntary “ugh”- a reflexive single girl reaction to the day of looovvvee I think- but then I considered my aversion to it. Sure it’s often filled with romance and mushiness and commercialism but it is a day devoted to celebrating love and as I’ve expressed in many previous posts, love can present itself in a plethora of relationships and cracks in the pavement. It wedges itself into your heart whether you’ve allowed for it or not and it softens the shell of aversion. Love can come from a boyfriend or girlfriend, a parent, a pet, a friend, a sister or brother, a grandparent and so on…all different types of love, but all love just the same. All worthy of making the world a little warmer, a little shinier and a little more forgiving.
So, I decided to change my stance on the whole thing. I’m one of those girls that claims not to be a “girly girl” but I caught every episode of Sex and the City like a religious superfan. My friends and I sipped lattes or martinis (depending on the time of day) and obsessed over manolos or jimmy choos we couldn’t afford. Miraculously somewhere along the way I discovered there were some valuable lessons to be learned from that show. Through this I was introduced to the idea that perhaps friends can be soulmates too. By soulmates I mean those that truly touch our hearts and let us know we’re good enough just the way we are. They’re the ones that make us laugh so hard we can skip the sit-ups at the gym and they’re the ones that know when we just need a hug and a cry. They’re the ones we call first with good news and bad and they’re the ones we share our funniest/ most humiliating stories with.
In search of Mr Right I’ve had my heart broken once or twice and my girls are the ones picking up the pieces, watching me slobber and hiccup in all my glory and loving me through it. They were next to me helping me devour that tub of ice cream I’d probably feel guilty about later and squirting whip cream into my mouth and loving me through it. They have become an integral part of my growing to be the person I want to be and they make me laugh, and what is a life without laughter? So, maybe it’s possible that in this life we get lots of soulmates if we open our hearts to them. Maybe they’re the road signs that help us find comfort and direction when the old life compass gets a bit thrown off.
It’s funny how much less menacing a day about love can feel when you get by with a little help from your friends. Whatever your personal situation remember that Valentines Day is a day devoted to celebrating love and in the true spirit of that, consider passing on love and kindness to another regardless of whether you know them or not. Valentines Day doesnt have to be so commercial. Bring a friend a coffee, curl up with a favourite movie and maybe some delicious dessert (Love Day calories don’t count), compliment a co-worker, do someone a favour. Remember, we’re all in this together.